Reality

 

There are things I can change and things that just are what they are. On a good day I am okay with all of it, but on other days I can feel wistful.

I do miss being young and fresh faced. Not that I look bad for someone my age, I just don't look thirty anymore. Because I am not.

I am in those hazy golden years where I still have the health and stamina to do pretty much whatever I want, except look good in a bathing suit. Reality is cruel.

My mind still works just like it always did. I still have the same likes and dislikes. I still feel the whole range of feelings I've always felt. It's possible I feel a lot less of those negative feelings that I felt as a younger person, but everything else has intensified.

I love more, am in awe more, feel passionately about things more. It's as if I know life is running out and I need to just suck the marrow right out of the bones. This world is an amazing place and the people in my life are more than amazing. So while some things do make me sad and that sadness, like the joy, is intensified, it is still pretty wonderful.

If life is what you make it, and I want to believe that is true, I want to make this life good as I can.