Everyone has feelings, but I believe I AM feelings. My DNA is composed of nothing but feelings, all rolled up and shaped to look like a woman. Constantly morphing, constantly being reshaped, constantly struggling with things other people take for granted.
I am sensitive to every breath and that can make me miss the big things, the important things, the things others assume are unmistakably visible.
Living with me or near me is a challenge. Even I know that. It is why I have been a loner so much of my life. You need a powerful ego and a great sense of self worth to be part of my life.
Yet there are four people who can weather this storm. People who know who I am, who understand me and are able to stand beside me through thick and thin. They are a gift from the angels. I give them credit for keeping me on this earth, for being willing to suffer the fall out of a woman who lives breath to breath.
Romantic tales and thoughts are fine, but they do not begin to approach the level of intensity of my life. I am seldom on the flat stretch. Every moment I feel the ecstasy of the pull upward, the tug of something coming, and then I plunge into the loss of that moment, losing everything! For a world accustomed to whipping around mountains and plodding through mud on a daily basis, this is incomprehensible. I am difficult.
So now I say thank you and send my heartfelt gratitude to those brave, steadfast souls who support and love me when I need it most.
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