Magnified

Imagine waking up in the morning and you can't put any weight on your ankle, or knee, or lift much with your elbow, or your pointer finger. Sometimes even the joints of your big toes hurt when they bend.

That is the story of my life. Even as an athletic younger person I had this problem.

There may be a reason, but I don't know what it is. There have been many guesses, but none of them really make sense. In the long run, it is just who I am. Who I have always been.

Until recently this was a condition I pretty much accepted. Long narrow bones connected by weak tendons seems to be my lot in life.

Lately, though, I find myself frustrated and even angry.  I do everything I know to do and my body just keeps reacting poorly.

I think people think that I don't walk enough because I am lazy, but that's not true. I would love to be outside walking! It's easier on earth than concrete, but the unevenness of the ground has its hazards too.

Coming out of nearly five months of inactivity where I couldn't walk at all, I am trying hard to get up and out, but the joints of my toes ache when they bend this week, the dropped bones of my left foot still pinch when I walk, and this morning my left knee hurts when I stand on it, probably from walking at odd angles because of the other.  It is very frustrating.

I have reached that stage in life where everything is getting harder. My kidneys can't deal with salt, my uric acid can't deal with pruines, my cholesterol shouldn't have too much fat, my pre type two diabetes lives in fear of too many carbohydrates.  I am supposed to be eating healthy and getting more exercise.

I am making a last ditch effort to do all of this the best way I know how.

It seems that age is more than just a drying up of youth. It's also a magnifying glass that focuses on and blows up every little flaw. If I had any advice for those coming up behind me it would be:


Well, I really don't know, because if I did, I would do it!