I think I can

I can’t believe this weather!  I get up and amble down to the park.  Once around the whole thing and then I go up and back each of the walks that bisect it and home.  It takes me forty minutes.  It is four tenths of a mile around the park, a tenth of a mile between my house and the park, and I figure the total distance is approximately two miles.

I come home soaked!  Honestly I look like I’ve been swimming instead of walking.  I am not used to this kind of heat and humidity.  For the past thirty years I have spent my time on screened in porches, in pools, or comfortably ensconced in air conditioning.

Part of me is proud that I can do this, but part of me wonders at the sanity of a woman my age who suddenly subjects herself to so many things she really isn’t fond of.

I have always wanted the quality things in life.  One nice thing has always drawn me more than ten shabby ones and this attempt at changing my lifestyle fits right into that sort of thinking.  “A healthy mind in a healthy body,” that is the ultimate in a quality life.  Without it everything else is a bit tainted.

I’ve lost fifty-two pounds and shed five clothing sizes.  I can indulge myself and go hit tennis balls again.  And last, but not least, it feels good to know I have been able to keep up with this for over five months.

I don’t respond well to extremes and I especially do not respond well to things that are forced upon me.  And…I don’t think most people are really any different.  It might make a good television show for some to watch when they see morbidly obese people doing extreme things, having extreme feelings and generally appearing to be miserable, but I don’t think it is something that is truly effective for the long haul.

The secret is to find success; even the tiniest bit of success will encourage me to continue on with something so I break all the rules.  I weigh myself every single day and my doctor finally admitted she does too!  That scale is a gentle nudge or a wondrous reward that keeps me jumping back on the horse every time I fall off.

I don’t try for a certain heart rate.  I just do the best I can in any given moment.  I do not go for a certain distance; I only go for time so my body can choose it’s own level.  These things work for me.  I am the little old lady who thinks she can!

And that is my mantra.  “I think I can, I think I can, I think I can…..”

And I do.