Feelings

There are sensory things in my life that really effect the way I feel. I don't understand why, but they just seem to evoke something like a primordial memory, or subconscious comfort that comes out of nowhere.

Usually it is the comfort of moving my fingers or thumbs a certain way. I suppose it is like sucking your thumb, or smoking, or something like that. It comforts and calms me and I can do it whenever I need that.

But another thing showed up yesterday for the first time in ages. I was doing a crossword puzzle and, because they are easy ones, I will make myself do them in different ways. Like from the bottom up, or only one side before the other, but this time I started in the middle. I suddenly looked at the pattern I had finished and felt a great sense of well-being.

I have no idea why such a pattern would make me feel so good. I also have no idea what that pattern was now, but if I did, I would do all my puzzles that way.