Weaving a new shell

Sometimes I feel like a turtle without a shell, a quivering mass of nerves and feelings totally exposed to a life that can be so overwhelming.

Relationships have often been emotionally exhausting experiences.

My actual body seems to regard everything as the enemy.  Pregnancy, medicine, even food can send it into attack mode.  Even my joints, muscles and tendons seem intent on escaping their designated places.

I was taught to just tough everything out.  I am strong. I can do this!  Like it or not.

But I am finally learning to come to peace with who I am.

I don't have to prove myself -- to me or anyone else.   

It's okay to be gentle with myself, to accept my shortcomings and look for my strengths because they are not as absent as I always believed.

A lot of this is due to the nurturing relationship I have had with my best friend the past five years.  Bestest likes me just the way  I am and I am beginning to see me through those eyes.

He has helped me weave my own shell out of love, understanding and acceptance.