Interview with a chicken

Me:  What's it like to be a hen today?

Hen: When I was young I thought about trying to escape the hum drum lay-an-egg-a-day world of my mother.  I wanted more.

Me:  What did you do?

Hen:  I sneaked out of the pen between the feet of the feeder a few times, but they always brought me back and then once, they put me in this tiny cage where I could barely turn around.  Oh, I could eat, but I couldn't run, or look for those dainty little tidbits that crawl along the ground.  After a while they put me back out in the pen with the others.

Me:  Was there any other critical turning point in your life?

Hen: Yes!  One day I saw the feeder come into the yard without the feed.  He grabbed my friend Clara and carried her off.  Clara was the bravest friend I had.  She was always trying to escape and she refused to lay eggs for the feeder unless he set us free. I never saw her again and I have laid an egg every day since then.

Me:  Has that turned out good for you?

Hen:  Pretty much.  Once in a while the feeder lets me keep my eggs and my children have been the delight of my life.  They are truly my raison d'etre. I would do anything for them.

Me:  Do you give them any special advice?

Hen:  I tell them, always be sure to preen, lay an egg daily, and beware of a feeder without feed.

Me:  How has this worked out?

Hen:  Pretty well, except a few of my sons flew the coop and disappeared.

Me: Where do you think they went?

Hen:  I try not to think. I hope they escaped through the feeder's feet.

Me: That sounds like a pretty good life. 

Hen: An egg a day!  Always lay an egg a day!  If you stop . . .

Me:  What happens when you stop?  Surely you've laid enough eggs by now?

Hen: I try not to think.