Imagings

 

I spend a lot of my time in my mind. I realize, when I think about it, that I always have. Even when I was less than four years old, I had a fantasy life. 

Way back then I dreamed I lived in a small white cottage with bright pink shutters and I had a little gtirl who was three years old. Looking back I guess that probably means I was pretty happy, because I was that child to my parents. 

In kindergarten my fantasy world was during nap time. Yes, in those days of half day kindergarten we had nap time. We would all get our throw rugs out of our cubbies and lie down on the floor where I imagined we all had little pup tents that we shared. Two to a tent and my buddy was a little boy I ended up having a crush on for the next seven years. In real life he and I were best friends until I moved away.

Moving away from all my friends at the end of sixth grade changed my fantasies. I met a new boy who was a patrol boy on the same corner I was a patrol girl. Now my fantasies were played out using an orange crate as a house for my Barbie and Ken dolls, who stood in for the two of us. We had a three year old little doll who was our child. I was so young and naive that when my period was later than usual I thought I had been thinking about him so much that God thought we were married and was sending us a baby!

Then we moved to the country and I began imagining myself as the hero of my fantasies as a teenager.  Whoever was my latest crush would find themselves in trouble of one sort or another and I would swoop in and save the day and take care of them.

I spent a lot of time day dreaming growing up and it hasn't changed much since then.  When I walk, or try to go to sleep, or am killing time anywhere, I just imagine my world the way it could be.