What's it all about

In the end my brother's ashes were simply blowing in the wind, but they carried our hearts with them, across land that he loved and I believe his passing drew our family even closer together.

As I draw closer to the inevitable end I am amazed at how short life is.

This summer has been long. Perhaps the longest summer I can remember. There were so many disappointments, so much sorrow, so much waiting, so many things that seemed to be moving backwards instead of forwards.

But maybe directions are just an illusion. Forwards. Backwards. Sideways. It's only here that really matters and here is always different. Different points of view. Different places. Different people. Different beginnings and endings.

All the pain, all the gloriously unique and special moments, good and bad, are only the bricks along the road that change the way. Almost always leading to something better in the end if I am honest and patient.

Right now, in this moment, most of my life is so sweetly perfect I am afraid to even think about it for fear it will dissipate and show itself to be only a dream and not the real foundation of living it really is.

But in the end, I too, will simply be ashes in the wind . . . and I hope it's at a Fall wiener roast where rosy cheeked people are eating caramel apples, and the scent of burning leaves fills the air.

"Come, little leaves,"
Said the wind one day,
"Come over the meadows
With me, and play;
Put on your dresses
Of red and gold;
Summer is gone,
And the days grow cold."
 
I want to rise in the in the aftermath of that wiener roast and leave the hearts behind me cozy and warm.