100%

I just heard that if  I drink 2-3 cups of coffee a day it lowers my chance of dying by 12%.

I can do that.

What else can I do?  Could I beat the odds and live forever?

My refrigerator looks like a color wheel for rainbows anonymous. I have enough fruits and vegetables in there to hide the pots of gold for a football team of leprechauns.

I get 8 to 10 hours of sleep every twenty four hours, in chunks and naps if not long prolonged bed fests.

The grain in my bread is so whole I almost need to eat rocks like a bird to grind it up in my stomach.

I exercise like a geriatric hamster walking round and round the block of my apartment complex.

I have a best friend to share things with and several other social outlets available throughout the month.

So, with all this great work, what is my risk of dying?

One hundred percent!

When, where and from what?  That is the question.