Belonging

Insider's jokes, there is something special about getting them. They are usually very subtle and require some sort of in depth knowledge of what is going on.

Families have them, television series have them, businesses have them. Getting them implies that you are not just part of the group, you are intimately attached to it in some way.

What I am thinking of isn't even really always a joke. It is an aside, a comment, a manner that is a very good way of drawing people in, of bringing them closer, or letting them know you understand who they are without actually saying so. It can be a look between people, a phrase used with a double meaning, an idea hidden between the lines for the very discerning.

Poorly done it makes some people feel like outsiders, but well done, it only appears to the ones it is aimed at. Used this way it is powerful, because we all like to belong -- even if we are loners -- and there is nothing like the intimacy of sharing something that seems to be just between us.

Bedrock belonging, something I think is a deep yearning and seldom met need in this day and age.