Pain!

The day before yesterday I was in so much pain I was willing to die. Yesterday was not much better. I went to Prompt Care on the fourth of July and they would only give me enough medicine to partially ease the pain for a few hours each day. They told me to wait until Monday and go to my primary care doctor.

Today I seem to have it under control. What a difference that makes!

This is turning out to be a turning point in my life.

When I had to go back to work I thought it was worth it to stay here in this apartment. Now, after forcing my body to do things it was no longer able to do and catching a very bad case of Covid in spite of being totally immunized, I realize going back to work was the worst mistake I've ever made in my life.

I honestly didn't think I had much choice. Rent everywhere is outrageous and I'm on a fixed income, but thanks to family I found a rent subsidized apartment. I just hope it isn't too late. I am trying desperately to regain my health, but I think I was trying too hard.

Trying to balance mental and physical health is always a bit tricky, but once a body begins failing to stand up to its old standards, it becomes critical.

My family has promised they will move me no matter what. Even if I can't help carry things to the truck. I have already packed as much as I can until that day comes and it's a good thing, because I have barely been able to get drinks of water, or get to my bathroom for the last three days.

Today was better. The pain seems to be under control if I am very careful not to move the wrong way, or put any pressure on my joints for more than a minute or two.

I have never felt this vulnerable in my life.