Settle

 

I have been walking a lot lately. It helps me deal with my world. Partly by just taking up time and partly by, sometimes, helping me sort out my thoughts.

Yesterday the wind was so strong it blew me off the sidewalk twice! Today it is still brisk. I can lean into it and it actually feels like it is helping in holding me up, but it is nothing like yesterday. I can even be grateful for the distraction of the wind.

At my age you might think everything would have settled down, but I don't think my life will ever be truly settled. I have very high expectations for both me and my life. I find it impossible to settle in any sense of the word.

I am a loner by nature, but a loner who needs one on one contact with people I find interesting. I am also a romantic. I tend to dramatize situations and that makes my life so much more difficult. I put myself into difficult situations so I am not surprised by any of this.

To settle or not to settle, that has always been the question in my life.

I do not settle.