Addiction

If the woman I just spoke to on the phone were not my sister I would block her out of my life forever. She is an enabler who cannot seem to learn that love is not giving people what they want and then being surprised when they continue to act badly.

My sister is a passive aggressive person who does exactly what she wants and then if things don't turn out the way she wants, she cries and moans and plays the "pitiful me" card. Yet if someone tries to really help her she goes right back to her old ways.

She is as addicted to being needed as her daughter is addicted to drugs. 

Neither of them will ever get better after forty years of the same give and take. I know that and if I continue to let my sister say what she is doing is everybody's fault but hers, then I will be an enabler too.

Now it has trickled down to another generation. My sister's grandson has an ulcer. He has had to live caught between his mother and grandmother his entire life and neither of them love him enough to make them do the work it will take to make things better. Instead each one blames the other for his problems.

But that is the way of addicts, isn't it?