Weighty work

I have been searching for a twin blanket for my daybed-only bed. My other blankets are huge. Folded in half doesn't work quite right and are mostly too hot, but twins are also really bigger than I need or want and I'm looking for a particular color and fabric to go with the couch part of the daybed.

I've read about weighted blankets for people with autism, but popular now for other people too. The idea is the weight calms you, feels like a hug, is comforting. They have an add where they keep dropping the weighted blanket on a woman in different situations and she immediately falls down in a deep sleep.

So I ordered a weighted blanket and a matching duvet cover to go with my couch daybed. They come in different sizes and weights depending on the person and the place it will be used. I ordered the one that was recommended for me.

I am such a raging optimist.

My first clue was when I could barely haul the box in the door. Still, I opened it, laid out the duvet cover and dragged the blanket over to the couch to insert it into the duvet. Second clue? It took everything I had to do this too.

When I finished, I could barely lift it to shake the blanket into place in the duvet, but I thought, I should really give this a chance. Maybe once it's all spread out it will be perfect! I spread it out and crawled underneath. It felt exactly like what it was. A twenty pound bag of heavy glass beads that settled down around me like a net, compressing all my parts and making turning over almost an impossibility. Now they tell me I will sleep so soundly I will no longer want to turn over?

I think that woman in the add fell down because someone dropped twenty pounds of blanket on top of her. I carefully folded everything back up. (Not easy because it was so heavy.) Packaged it back in the box and managed to get it into my car so I could drive to UPS. All the way there I wondered how I might get both boxes in the door and finally decided I would just leave my hatchback open and pray someone would open the store door for me.

A postman drove up as I neared the building and jumped out to open the door, but his hand slipped off and for one agonizing moment I thought they were closed and I was going to have to make my way back to the car. I panicked and cried out, "Oh noooooo!" Another customer laughed as the door opened and I must have looked elated. (I felt elated.) I stepped into the store and the tall teenager behind the counter rushed towards me to help, but I beat him to the counter where I dropped both boxes with a great sigh.

He gave me a receipt and then went to pick up the boxes. "Oh my God!" He said, laughing. "This is really a blanket? If I put it in the overhead, I'd never get it out."

I found a nice little twin blanket at TJMaxx on the way home and when I have the energy, I will put it on my bed.