Respect

Simple respect may be the single most important part of any relationship, or at least the foundation of it. I think loss of respect signals the beginning of the end.

Love is complicated and far from being linear. It is possible to love someone without liking them. It is even possible to love someone without respecting them, but it is much more difficult.

Life style, the way one treats people, how information is gathered, the way it is used, even the way it is processed affects a relationship.

If I really disagree with the way these things are being done, or perhaps just don't understand why they are done this way, it is difficult for me to be close to someone. And if their way of doing things puts other people I love in danger, it creates an almost insurmountable barrier between us.

I am childlike in many ways. I honestly don't care, or even notice things like color, race, sexual preferences, or even gender most of the time, but I do notice logic, reason, sensitivity, and empathy.

Someone who is purposefully crude, or rude, ignorant, or passive aggressive grates on me like fingernails on a chalkboard. After a while I have to get away from them or I will start trying to change them and everyone knows that is pretty much impossible. It creates a strife that eventually becomes all out war.

We can agree to disagree, but after a certain point that disagreeableness becomes a warning that compatibility is gone and the best thing, for everyone, is to back away.

I wish I had realized these things years and years ago.