The question

I remember being very pregnant and on my way to the doctor when my car died on a busy exit to the mall. We did not have cell phones then, so I got out and crawled up an icy hill to a gas station where I called my husband for help.

He told me he was busy and I should take care of my own car. I asked if he would come get me so I didn't have to crawl back down the hill and he said no.

So I called a tow truck and made my way back to my car where I kept trying to start it and finally succeeded. Then I hurried to my appointment with the obstetrician since I was already late.

It seems my husband changed his mind and did eventually go looking for our car. He was angry that I had not called to tell him it started, but why would I? He had said he wasn't coming.

I often think of this when I pass that corner and remember the embarrassment of blocking traffic and the fear of injuring our baby as I made my way up and down that icy slope.

But not until today, when I was walking, did I think, "Why did he always take the good car and park it at work all day, leaving me with the totally unreliable one to transport myself and our children to and from school and doctor appointments?

Sometimes it takes 37 years to ask the right question.