Me

Oh to see myself as others see me and recognize it as the truth, or perhaps, maybe not the truth.

The curse of being human, and trying to be honest is that I find it difficult to trust my own vision of myself.

I think I can give a pretty fair assessment of someone else. I have all sorts of tricks for doing that. I see them as their mother's child, as a son of Adam and daughter of Eve, as a human being who only wants to be the best they know how to be.

Trying to look at myself the same way is much more difficult. There is a part of me that says, "You know better."  Or I believe that I want to be something so badly, that I see it when it's not there.

I know better than to believe that seeing is believing. So much of what people see is only a facade, or fleeting impression.

Once you get past that, things get darker and a part of me always thinks that deeper, darker part is less than in some way. That earthy, baser, less formal part is what I value in those I really deeply love.

But it becomes a flaw in those I don't, so I suppose the challenge is to love more and include myself in that.

Looking at myself with love is not something I was brought up to do, so maybe I am not done growing. The hardest work is still to come.

If everyone really loved themselves I suspect the world would be a better place and the place to start is with me. Now that is a challenge!