Dastardly Whiplash

I remember when we got our first foster child.  I wanted to buy her everything in the world for Christmas.  I wanted to make up for all those years she had nothing.

My father warned me that it might be too much.  She might be totally overwhelmed.  I didn't really understand that.

How can there be too much goodness, too many good things?

Right now I think I am beginning to understand the feelings.  My world is simply overflowing with wonderful things!  I can barely find the time to squeeze them all in anymore and they just keep coming!  I am starting to feel slightly overwhelmed.

I don't understand why all this goodness is flowing my way and I am sort of afraid it is some kind of illusion that will suddenly be ripped out from under me leaving me hanging.  I cannot imagine how that can be, but my mind does try to find these things!

I half expect to see Dastardly Whiplash coming up behind me, ready to tie me to the railroad tracks by the strings of some bad judgement call I've made.  I don't know what it would be, but a little part of my mind just keeps mumbling something I can't quite hear.

Ridiculous anxiety.  I need to find a way to let go of this.