Reaching out

 

I have lived, like many people I suppose, among people who gave with one hand while taking away with the other. It creates chaos in the mind. Such a world, for all its apparent stability is very difficult to make sense of.

So when someone comes along and offers me a hand up and out of the safety of my present life, it can be hard to accept it. How do I know they won't pull me up halfway and then let me drop? 

I have become a Doubting Thomas. I need to see and feel the holes in my lord's hands in order to believe, or maybe I just need him to say the right words that trigger the trust button hidden deep in my mind.

But even touching those tortured hands is not enough. Trust requires two people reaching out, holding on, believing that the abyss doesn't beckon from beyond.

Yesterday I was able to reach out.