The great Silence

I sit in the silence for the first time in a long time.  Breathing in, breathing out.  Letting thoughts go with the whisper of a breath -- again and again.

Listening, opening, letting go of wants and needs, desires, dreams.  Letting go of my need to control.  Thy will not my will.  Emptying myself of me . . .

Making room for healing, for listening, for the greatness of something beyond me and my understanding.

Trying not to be anything but empty and at first it is difficult.  I come back to myself again and again.

Until I don't.
 
I had forgotten how beautiful the emptiness is.  There is no throbbing ankle, no aching heart, no regret, no hope. 


Absolute peace of being.


This is not the place to look for miracles, or cures.  In this place there is no need for those things and if I find them when I leave?  Well, so much more of a reason to come back.

I open my eyes, thinking that once more I have succumbed to my inability to persevere, that it has only been a few minutes, but I discover it has been forty minutes!

I am so relaxed, so okay in this moment.  I need to remember that.  I need to come here more.