Digging deeper

Once upon a time I thought I wanted to be an archaeologist.  Then I gave it up. Now I wonder if the time has come to resurrect that interest and apply it to my own life.

Time to dig through the layers of trash and debris, the strata of mixed memories and emotions, the bedrock of times gone by.

Time to sift through each layer, looking for the bones and teeth of something big enough to eat me alive. And allow the rest to fall into a pile of detritus where it will be re-assimilated back into the dust from which it came. Not that this is not important, just that I can only deal with so much in the life span left to me.

Will these bones explain why my family tends to eat its young alive and spit out the fragments of all those who do not escape?  Or will they verify that I was something worth keeping and therefore allowed to go on and raise my own offspring in the hope of creating something even more worthy?

I think it is the latter.

I think that any creature capable of reinventing itself is a good step for survival of the species.

Those distant ancestors with their gnashing teeth and long tails for balance have evolved and continue to evolve into less and less and it takes more and more to really understand them.

Few things are really what they seem and that is terrifying.

Perhaps this digging is not a good thing.

Maybe I should just bury all of this deeper, set a new goal and go forward with the knowledge that I am capable of becoming whatever I need to be if I work hard enough at it.