Wonder

 

As I embark on one of my last big adventures my whole world is in upheaval.

People I love are facing horrible things, so I cannot feel bad about simply moving into subsidized senior housing in a town I've never loved.

I have family there and they seem to love me, so maybe that is all that matters. The rest will take care of itself.

Today I wrapped up lots of loose ends and I am exhausted. I realize my life is still very good and it is up to me to make it better and more meaningful.

I am remembering my father tonight. He was one of the wisest, most intelligent people anyone ever met and he never said an unkind word to me. Ever. 

My youngest son is very much like him. Kind, caring, aware and full of conviction. 

I wonder, is this all there is to life? 

My life.

Have I used it wisely, or wasted it?

It's probably too late to wonder.